BK asks :
Hi Lucy,
Just today found out that my younger sister is getting married and I feel envious. I don't have a boyfriend and I feel very low. I'm 44 and I think I'll never find anyone who’s interested in me. I'm on a few dating websites.
Hi BK,
Agony Aunts on Female First
The most important thing is to not compare yourself to others. This sounds easier said than done when someone so close is getting married but if you constantly judge your life by your sister's or anyone else's, you will never be happy. There will always be someone out there who you feel is doing better than you, who's in a relationship, earns more money, has a bigger car or goes on more holidays than you. It's human nature to want more than you have but how often do such things bring true contentment?
Try to focus on where you are now and where you want to be and put your energy into your life. Work by your own barometer because you have a different path to everyone else and that's ok.
Are the dating sites you are on working for you? Perhaps you need to try a new one? Or put more time into finding a date on the ones you are already signed up to? Maybe you need to look for a more bespoke service? Have you tried speed dating events or nights that are set up by dating providers? This might be an option if you are feeling disheartened by the online offerings. The dating game requires consistency and commitment- just like looking for a job- persistence pays off in the end.
Your age does not rule you out of the dating scene, many people of similar age will be looking for the same thing you are. Try not to let your sister getting married make you focus on the negatives, if you are keen to find someone- let it spur you on to invest more of your time in finding someone rather than giving up.
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