Alex asks :
After 9 months of being together, he doesn't love me. It was about 5 months into our relationship that i felt so strongly about him, i knew i loved him. I was convinced he felt the same, until about 2 months later when i told him i loved him (after ages of holding it in) and he didnt say it back, and hasnt since. And now, as we've just reached our 9 month mark, its all i can think about. That he doesnt feel the same, that he could leave me at any moment and not really care. I mean, he acts like he absolutely adores me, though i am just not 100% happy that its not love. I have told him my worries and he has said just to give him time, but i am getting more and more down about it, its all i think about when we are together. Am i expecting too much too soon from him?
Yin replies
Nine months is not that long to be together in the scheme of things. If you felt something early on then that is great, but for guys it often takes more time. If he acts like he adores you then this should leave you with the confidence that he wants to be with you until he feels ready to say it to you back.
Yang replies
If you keep on bringing it up you could end up pushing him further away rather than bringing him closer to you. People don’t like to be pressured into having feelings about something or someone. When he does say it to you, you will know that it is genuine because it won’t be forced or prompted, just the way he is feeling for you at the time.
If he had wanted to leave you he would have by now, so relax and enjoy what you have, let him adore you and see what comes of the future. If you fixate on this one element of your relationship you are not allowing yourself to enjoy being in a couple, when there are lots of good things it can offer.
tagged in Love Relationship Happy yin and yang agony aunt
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