Lauren asks :

I have major issues with someone touching me when I haven't known them for at least a year and this is leaving me to be very lonely and sexually frustrated. When I date people, if they try to hug me or hold my hand I can feel anything from nervous and twitchy to feeling physically sick to having a full blown panic attack. It's not great. I want to try and sort this but I can't afford private therapy. Any ideas?

Yin replies

You don’t have to go for private therapy; you can apply through the NHS. Go and see your doctor and ask to be referred to a counsellor who will be able to give you the necessary treatment following an assessment.

Has something happened in your past that could have triggered this reaction? It may be that something that has happened to your previously has made you cautious about affection, which needs to be dealt with first. The reason you are struggling is probably because you have not come to terms with it or perhaps forgotten what is the root cause which therapy can draw out. 

Yang replies

It will start with little steps to get you more familiar with people and build it up to the point where you can feel comfortable enough to be touched by another person. Once you sort out what has been the initial spark of this fear then you will be better equipt to go out and find someone to experience new things with! 


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