Emma asks :
I slept with this guy at uni and the guy implied it was purely a one night stand. We were flirting and kissing all night, dancing and partying, then he came back to mine and we had great sex. He text me the following day asking he how i was etc, being polite and courteous but i haven't heard from his since (admittedly, only been about three days since our hook up). I have a thing for him, and have to admit I haven't stopped thinking about him or that night. We both spoke about relationships when we were together admitting that none of us want relationships at university, but I must admit i can't stop thinking about us two together. Should I be honest with him and say it would be great to see him again (likely to be rejected), try and make conversation randomly, wait and see if he tries to message me again or wait until i see him again in town (scheduled event in a week we are both attending), see how he acts and if it happens again? Or should I play hard to get anyway and not sleep with him again, would that make me see more elusive to him? HELP!
Yin replies
If you told him when you talked that you didn’t want relationships at University this is likely why he slept with you, because you were both on the same page- a no strings attached hook up. It could be that the only reason you have developed feelings for him is because you have been intimate and may not have otherwise. Women place stronger attachments to sex than men do so the likelihood is that it meant more to you than to him.
Yang replies
You need to be truthful with yourself; if you do want a relationship then be honest with the men you talk to, if you don’t than it sounds like he might be up for having some sort of casual sexual relationship. Be honest with what you want or you will get hurt. If he has shown no interest other than the day after then perhaps put this one to rest and find someone else to turn your affections to.
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