Georgie asks :
Hi Lucy,
I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and a 1/2 and he seems to have lost interest in the bedroom. We are only having sex like once a fortnight and when we do he just rushes through it. What should I do to make him interested again?
Hi Georgie,
Agony Aunts on Female First
Sex after being together for so long can feel like a habit, rather than something you enjoy- it’s often not a reflection of a partner, but more about familiarity and falling into the same routine together. Every couple goes through this at some point in their time together- it's how you overcome it that counts. Just like anything else in your relationship it needs attention or it will only continue to slide.
If you are not happy with the frequency and duration of your sexual encounters then perhaps talk to him about it. Not in a critical way but more focusing on what you had together and why and what you miss. If you don’t tell him then he might assume a quickie is all you want now.
There are many things you can try to spice things up- bondage, dressing up for one another, sex toys, lingerie, dirty talk- if you have not tried any of these then it might be worth giving some of them a chance.
Perhaps a good place to start is if you talk about it first. In a way, having this lull is a trigger for you both to communicate more and work out a solution- two very important elements of a successful relationship. Sometimes if issues like this remain unresolved you can become resentful of one another. Perhaps try to nip this in the bud before it gets any worse.
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