Kate asks :
Hi Lucy,
I really don’t know what to do. I spend pretty much every night with a guy. We have slept together a few times last year but not since. He does try it on. It’s not that I don’t want to but he is in a long distance relationship and it doesn’t feel right because he has a girlfriend even though he spends more time with me than her. I really think I am falling in love with him and some days it feels like he is too. We sleep in the same bed most nights and spend a lot of time together. I just don’t know what to do about the situation anymore!!!
Our Reply
Hi Kate,
If you feel it’s wrong to sleep with him while he has a girlfriend then have you considered asking him to leave her for you? Or what it is that you two have? If you spend every night together and he spends more time with you than her, then perhaps if you tell him how you feel it might give him the nudge to leave her.
The only thing I would say is that if he has done this to his girlfriend; if you did get together would he do the same behind your back? Be mindful that he has been cheating on his girlfriend for a while now- is that what he does- or are you an exception?
If you could talk to him then at least that way you will know if there is anything other than sex and sleeping together in it for you.
He may lead you both on for as long as he can if he gets the chance- so by talking to him you might find out if you mean anything to him. You might feel like he is falling for you, but being told is a much more secure place to be. Plus, being able to communicate with each other early on is a great basis for a relationship.
tagged in long distance relationship yin and yang agony aunt
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