Eva asks :
Hi Lucy,
My daughter and me went on holiday with our friend. Our friend argued with us and left our holiday home. She behaved badly to me and my daughter. We both said we would not be friends with her again. However I recently contacted our friend after several months and forgave her. My daughter is now so angry with me that she says it's the end of our relationship. I'm devastated. What should I do?
Hi Eva,
Agony Aunts on Female First
It sounds like you and your daughter made and agreement and perhaps you didn't tell her about your change of heart. She may be angrier at the fact you didn't tell her you had changed your mind rather than because you forgave your friend.
She may just need time to cool down- perhaps it's the shock if you were both firm about your previous decision.
If she becomes uncommunicative, then it might be worth writing her a letter to explain why you decided to re-establish the friendship. It might also help to apologise for not including her in that decision and why you wanted to do it on your own.
Could you arrange a meeting with the three of you, so your friend can have a chance to talk to her face to face and apologise for her actions?
It seems that your daughter might have reacted the way she did out of principle, so she may rethink her decision to end your relationship if she has some time to reflect.
If not, then you may need to think hard about whether this friendship is worth affecting your relationship with your daughter or whether your gut reaction was the right one when you were on holiday.
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