Siobhan asks :
Hi Lucy,
I have been with my boyfriend for four years. His attitude is horrible all he does is moan about everything or shouts and bangs because something annoys him. I have tried to talk to him but he doesn’t listen and I am just broken.
Hi Siobhan,
Agony Aunts on Female First
It sounds like you are in a very negative place with your partner right now. If he is like this all the time, then it is bound to affect your mood and how you see him and your relationship.
If you have tried talking to him about it to no avail, then perhaps suggest some relationship counselling. Sometimes it takes an outsider’s perspective to cast some light on how his attitude is affecting your relationship.
Maybe he is so absorbed in this mentality that he can’t see how it’s impacting on you.
People do deal with anger in different ways, some like to be loud and make noises with things around them to make the point that they are not happy in that moment. It might not be about you, it could be that he is having trouble at work, or that he is feeling a bit low right now- however if it is making you ‘broken’, then it sounds like it needs to be addressed. Could you suggest that he go and see the doctor for some counselling if you think it has crossed into something deeper like depression?
Couples generally take things out on each other (verbally) because to some extent they know that they can and will probably be forgiven, because the recipient loves them. Some behaviors can be excused if it’s not a regular occurrence, however this sounds like it’s a constant in your life.
If you have tried talking to him, suggest some outside help and nothing changes, then maybe you need to break away from this negativity and find someone who has a more positive outlook on life.
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