Many couples enjoy sex talk as part of their flirting and love making, phone sex lines prove this is a common desire among men, and many people "dirty talk" comes easy.

If you are in a relationship where you have many things in common, you each love, sex and sexuality, physically and mentally, you are compatible both in the bedroom and out, with the exception of one thing.

A small thing, a few words really, he asks you to talk dirty. You want very much to be able to do for him, but every time he asks for it, you freeze, with a head full of thoughts you are unable to come out with any words to speak. If you find yourself in this position don’t panic.

Talking dirty doesn't have to be dirty.

Certainly there are plenty of very nasty things you can say using more sensual and sexual phrasing without using words that would offend you. Although you should throw in a nicely placed "c**k" or "c**t" or "t**" occasionally, men seem to like 'body parts' and the nasty words for them. Too many clinical sounding terms for body parts may be a turn off.

According to men, "It's not what you say, but how you say it." Focus your mind on how much you enjoy sex with him, how your body tingles with excitement when he touches you, and how aroused you get when you give him pleasure. Now describe all of this to him. "I like to run my hands along your thighs, would you like me to......" or "I love the feeling of your c** growing hard in my hand. You make me so wet and aroused."

If you feel you won't be able to say it with a straight face, or if seeing him watch you speak makes you nervous, try whispering it breathlessly in his ear. Or use a low, sexy voice and brush your lips across his belly as you say it. You could also listen to a phone sex line but beware these tend to cost £1.50 per minute and you can soon rack up a large phone bill to pick up some tips.

Include him in the conversation. "Do you like it when I touch myself here?" "I just love to rub your blank, may I touch you there?" "I'm so hot for you, tell me how you want me to touch you." Most of the trouble is thinking of what to say. Practice, practice, practice. You can copy text from a book or from an adult film, just reading an adult story aloud to your lover is, to some, very steamy foreplay. Write out ahead of time some things you might say, and practice saying them.

Things that sound silly or uncomfortable the first time you say it, will seem quite normal by the 50th repetition. Try role play, taking on specific role say nurse, or maybe a maid may help create the mood, dress up in one of those sexy nurses uniforms you will soon be immersed in the role. Let him know what you are going to do to him, and while you are pleasing him describe all of your actions and how they are arousing you. Say something like, "Running my tongue along your thigh like this gets me really hot and makes me want to suck your c***.") Men love to hear how much they excite you and how they arouse your body.

Dirty Talk: So give him an ego boost.

And remember, sex talk is not just for during sex, try catching him off guard, and whisper something like, "Later I'd like to kiss and nibble your neck and trace my tongue along your sexy chest." This sort of foreplay will definitely set his heart racing with anticipation and will have the desired effect in the trouser region. If you just don’t have the courage to talk dirty to him don’t worry there are other ways to produce the same effects. Your positive physical response in bed will still mean as much to him as your words. When between the sheets, writhe with him, moan often and loudly, and try to toss in a few one-liners such as "Oh, that's good!" and "I love to feel you inside me".

You could also try ringing him up at work and talking dirty to him it will be easier as it’s not face to face. Say: When you're at your staff meeting this afternoon, imagine that I am hiding under the table. And while your boss is expounding about the new sales plan for your company, I'll be unzipping your pants and softly and gently sucking on your c***."

Remember he has the rest of the day to imagine, and he cannot do anything about it. But just think how turned on he will be when he arrives home and finds you dressed sexily ready for action. Remember anticipation, the mind, and being kept waiting all add to the pleasure.

For more help try the dirty talking and texting tips book.

Visit the Ann Summers website

 

  1. by tania 18th Mar 2008 02:27

    hi. just wanted to say i really enjoyed reading this. thanx! :)

  2. by SK.. 05th Apr 2008 19:11

    enjoyed while reading.....and while doing....!!!

  3. by mesra 24th May 2008 04:48

    like the fact that it has specific sentence examples..very helpful

  4. by rk 29th Jul 2008 22:42

    i love this!

  5. by k k 08th Aug 2008 19:47

    it's good for starters...but most men like it a tad filthier

  6. by FuckLove! IWantSex! 31st Aug 2008 21:08

    this has helped a bit, but really needs to be more dirty

  7. by chewy 27th Sep 2008 19:46

    what should you say when your on the bottom ?

  8. by kammy 14th Oct 2008 23:02

    This is a really easy to read article and very helpful too.

  9. by ag 30th Oct 2008 20:18

    thanks!

  10. by katty 22nd Dec 2008 21:52

    me and my boyfriend just start
    having sex and we wanted to try diffrent ways but its hard when its both are 1st time help?

  11. by Aqua 07th Feb 2009 18:42

    Both me and my boyfriend are into raunchy sex talk so the language is pretty tame on this site. We love each other deeply, but when it comes to sex, the dirtier the better. We don't m... Read More

  12. by malcolm 15th Feb 2009 15:57

    well i think sex is a wonderful thing but u have to take the time and enjoy it watch a little move of porn sometimes it helps thats 4 the people who wants to learn.

  13. by alixion 10th Apr 2009 19:54

    hey me and my boyfriend have sex but most of the time i don't feel turned on i mean some times the sex is great but half the time it's crap and he hardly does any foreplay or dirty talk... Read More

  14. by LoveDom 28th Apr 2009 03:41

    Haha. Idk how I found this forum. But as a successful Dom in BDSM relationship, my sub is my slut and dirty words? Its beyond dirty words. You all are just vanilla women i just wanted t... Read More

  15. by Michael 28th Apr 2009 15:05

    I have to agree, this is really "vanilla." Sad that so many women can be so clueless about their own sexuality! When my girl and I go at it, it's beyond filthy. She likes to be treat... Read More

  16. by chloe 08th Jul 2009 08:20

    This is just what I needed. Glad to know Im not alone in needing this sort of advice :)

  17. by Unkwon Guy 13th Jul 2009 00:38

    Didn't even read this before i tried it, im 17 male :P i just came out to my girlfriend 'cumm for me baby, cumm' & she wentt soo hyper :) couldn't stop kissing me or anything & yeh, she... Read More

  18. by hc 19th Jul 2009 15:45

    Thank you for this, I just love it

  19. by James 09th Aug 2009 12:42

    I have an erection now. I wish my girlfriend still did that.

  20. by Katie 25th Aug 2009 17:48

    This was really helpful. Everything you mentioned is an issue with myself. I really want to be able to talk dirty to my guy but i always freeze up and get uncomfortable. Any more tips w... Read More

  21. by PoiiSoN 18th Sep 2009 06:17

    OMG I LOV3D R3ADING THIS. IT GAV3 M3 A LOT OF GR3AT ID3AS, IM GOING TO HAV3 S3X WITH MY MAN FOR TH3 FIRST TIM3 && I WANT IT TO B3 PERF3CT!!

  22. by oooooooooooooooooooooh 27th Oct 2009 14:42

    this made me get a hard on, i wish i had a gf to do this to me.....

  23. by Liz 15th Dec 2009 00:47

    i was realy impressed with this..
    it helped alot.

  24. by Kristan B. 26th Dec 2009 08:03

    Thank you very much you saved my relationship. Plus my husband LOVES it.
    Thanks again,
    Kristan B.

  25. by Janet 05th Jan 2010 15:51

    Ladies and gents this is very important to a couple recently i have found out that this is something my husband was looking for for a while and becuase we never steped out of the box he... Read More

  26. by katin 25th Jan 2010 14:26

    thanks soo much its so helpful

  27. by lisa 02nd Feb 2010 13:44

    This is sooo right love trying it out our love life is much spiced up !!!

  28. by brina 21st Mar 2010 07:59

    can anyone help me with this onee: if a guy you like or your talking to asks you is anything you would love for me to do to you, what would it be? i need an answer!!! thanks girls

  29. by sarah 20th Jun 2010 05:16

    this was an outstanding article!!

  30. by satish jindal 08th Aug 2010 19:04

    talking dirty does not mean behave inhuman way.talking dirty is for excitement not for hurting the feeling of eah other othwise it would spoil the exercise. be nice and behave like human being not like animal.

  31. by nick121 21st Aug 2010 14:28

    Lovely to read and certainly has given me some nice ideas which I will put into my lovemaking in future. If all husbands and wife's or partners read this I think there would be less pro... Read More

  32. by fishalot 30th Nov 2010 17:52

    This is so true for so many, I enjoy her telling me how, in detail, she was desired by men in her past or whle out on the town with the girls last week. It excites me that good looking... Read More

  33. by sexy 06th Jan 2011 02:56

    i love it, it has help a lot to make me know how to turn on my man him love it

  34. by elmo 31st Jan 2011 02:00

    thank you so much this site helped me so much

  35. by Juan 03rd Apr 2011 18:14

    Most dirty talking is done by people who do not know each other personaly.They just heat themselves up and mostly masturbate , during or after.

  36. by cmeminnie04 25th Jul 2011 20:07

    Really good pointers

  37. by mmm 02nd Dec 2011 06:35

    this help me at lot thanks