A friend with benefits can seem like a great thing; someone to have a laugh with and enjoy each other's company as well as sex pretty much when you want it. And the best thing of all is that you don't have any comminments to this person. It seems like the perfect setup for someone who is not quite ready to settle down in a long-term, commited relationship but still craves the attention of the oppisite sex. What could possibly go wrong? But can a friend with benefits ever work or will both parties end up getting hurt in the long run?
Relationships on Female First
Ask yourself these questions before you seal the deal:
Will you be upset if you see or hear of your friend with benefits hooking up with someone else?
Do you get sad if you don't talk to you friend with benefits for a day?
Are you wondering why you haven't been asked on a date by your friend with benefits?
If the answer is yes to any of the questions above, seer clear of him.
It is important to discuss with your friend with benefits what you both want out of each other. If one wants more, the setup will not work and one or both of you will get end up getting hurt.
An agreement needs to be set up between the both of you so you are both clear on what is and what isn't acceptable. This could be from never turning up at each other houses uninvited to flaunting other people in front of each other. You both need to be clear on how best to maintain the relationship in order to keep it simple.
Make sure you don't confuse what you have with each other and consider a potential relationship with him. You're doing this because this is what you both want and getting emotinally attached could bring a stop to it all.
A friend with benefits is all about the physical so that means no dates and you don't need to feel like you have to see them. You're both doing this because you want to, not because you have to. It is a complete no-strings-attached relationship.
One of the key elements of a friend with benefits is trust. Without trust, the relationship will come crashing down. It is important that you are both 100% honest with each other and if you start dating someone else, than you should tell them. A friend with benefits involves no commintment and you are free to date whoever else you want. If you lie to one another, the other will end up feeling hurt and betrayed.
It is likely that one of you will become attached and get hurt but if you both make an agreement and don't expect more, a friend with benefits relationship is the perfect thing for any commitment phobic.
By Claire Lancaster