Phone sex!
With work being scarce and university becoming more competitive to get into, couples are finding themselves increasingly separated by commitments that sometimes are impossible to get out.
It is unfortunate for the romance your life, however if you have a long term plan with someone then these are sometimes the sacrifices that we need to make. The question posed to me a lot as an agony aunt is how to maintain it when their partner leaves.
Make the call- Phoning your partner every day you are away from each other means that you are both kept in the loop with what you have been doing with your respective daya as you would if you were coming home to one another.
It also helps to hear a tone of voice rather than just read a text because you can gauge if you partner needs tome TLC after a bad day or when they are missing you more than normal.
A text a day…- Texts and emails are a nice littler reminds throughout the day that your partner is thinking of you and that they are making the time for you even when they are busy at work.
Get focused- Don’t resent someone for the situation. It isn’t their fault; they are doing it for a future with you and a better one at that most of the time. Being resentful, moody and stubborn gets you nowhere and leaves the other person feeling like it’s not worth it, when a lot of the time it is. Talk about what you will be doing together so you don’t focus on missing them so much. Talking about things that can’t be only gets you down but discussing what can be when you are together is a much more positive state of mind! It gives you both a common goal to get you through the days you are apart.
Often working away means isolation, as very few people who work away make meaningful relationships and are often hotel bound or have dinner on their own, you are their only point of contact in their evening. If you are negative in this time, you might have a friendly shoulder to cry on but they have no-one.
Dirty talk!- Phones are great tools for phone sex too, so if you are feeling a little horny and lack the physical presence to act on it then give them a call and whisper sweet nothings down the phone. If you are bashful about dirty talk then pleasure yourself while your partner listens- this is just as much of a turn on for your man!
Time well spent- When you do get time together try to make joint decision on what you will do together. Sometimes doing nothing with a weekend can be a blessing when you are living in each other’s pockets. However if you have travelled back from work to see your partner and you don’t get out of your pyjamas, this can feel like you have wasted precious time.
Try to get a balance of chilling out under the duvet watching a movie and getting out there for night out, shopping, cinema or anything that you usually enjoy together. Just be sure not to go on overdrive where you have so many plans that you don’t have any time alone- it is a very difficult balancing act!
A lasting impression- Finally make an effort- with yourself and with your contact. Instead of moping around in sweats and a baggy sweaters put on your best make up, clothes and smile so he craves you when he is away as he will realise what he is missing and appreciate the effort you have made.
Surprise!- If you get the opportunity to visit them then do it! A surprise works wonders if you call them as you are setting off! There is something wonderfully romantic about travelling to see someone. The anticipation drives you wild and the greeting at the other side is always dramatic and passionate, so it’s definitely worth it! It’s an opportunity for role play too- pretend that you are the other woman and you have to keep it a secret from his partner back at home!
tagged in Partner long distance relationship