Elle asks :
For the past few years I have been suffering from depression, I stopped going out and when my friends wanted to meet up I always put them off with some excuse or another, it must have been very frustrating for them and they didnt, or still dont, know that I am depressed. Now I don't have any friends and I feel really isolated and alone. I dont get texts messages, phone calls, emails etc and it has been like this for two or more years. Just saying it now upsets me, two years without any friends. I have no one to talk to and I feel like the bridges are burnt and they won't want to be friends anymore. I feel embarraessed about my depression and I dont want to talk to them about it and explain why we stopped being friends.I started comfort eating a lot and have put on weight so I dont feel comfortable socialising because i have changed so much physically and mentally as well. What should I do?
Yin replies
Hi Ella, thanks for writing in.
Before you can think about friendships, you need to take care of yourself and get some help for the way you are feeling. Call the Samaritans, they offer a 24 hour service for when you need to talk and so are there at any hour for whenever you feeling at your worst. The main thing is that you talks about your feelings with someone.
Make an appointment at the doctors; it may be that you need to be referred onto a counsellor. If none of your friends have stuck by you during this difficult time then they are not worth your time. Friendship should be through the bad and the good. Once you get the help you need the more equipt you will feel to go out again and socialise.
Yang replies
Exercise is the best natural way to get your endorphins racing and make you feel better about yourself. Try eating foods that are natural mood boosters. You can also talk to your doctor about seeing nutritionist who can advise you on what foods are best for you to regain your energy and confidence.
Most of all you should never feel embarrassed about being depressed. Depression affects a huge number of people, maybe some of your friends too but they have not told anyone either. Why not try and talk to a family member too? They may surprise you and be your best form of support right now and find ways with you to help you get through.
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