Katherine asks :
Hi Lucy,
I'm a newly married 24 year old, with a baby on the way, almost 6 months gone. My husband has suggested we have a 19 year old boy live in our apartment with us for 6 weeks until our lease is up. My problem is that we're still getting to know each other and we argue a lot. I don't think this is a good example for a teenage boy. The other problem is that my 27 year old husband acts more like a 17 year old boy, plays video games constantly, doesn't have a job and has no desire of getting off his backside to do anything. I don't want to clean and tidy after 2 teenagers and I feel this will put a lot more strain on our relationship. The good side would be the extra income from this other boys rents seeing as we have none. What should I do?
Our Reply
Hi Katherine,
This sounds like very difficult decision to make, given that you need the financial support as well as support from your husband.
Have you talked to him about his lack of help around the house? If you are far into your pregnancy then you will probably need more help than usual. If he is not working then perhaps ask him to help you more with chores. Arguments, coupled with the stress of worrying and the extra strain you are putting on yourself to make up for his lack input, could be detrimental to you and the baby, so its worth trying to get this nipped in the bud as soon as you can.
If you feel that this boy moving in, despite the financial help, might give your partner an excuse to act younger than his years, then it might be worth putting him off. If you think your privacy might be comprised and you need more time to invest in your relationship to try and fix your issues, bringing someone else on the scene might not help matters.
Are most of you arguments about money? If so then this might give you the breather that you need. However with this extra income it might make your partner less inclined to get a job.
Either way you are going to be parents very soon, so whatever you decide needs to be in the best interest of your new family unit, so a bit of forward thinking is required here.
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