Laura asks :
Hi Lucy,
I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years and iv been best friends with the same lad for about 10 years I don't want to ruin a friendship but we recently slept together and now we have feelings and neither of us know what to do help?
Our Reply
Hi Laura, thanks for getting in touch.
If you have slept with someone else, this could be an indicator that things are not going well with your boyfriend. If you have developed feelings for your best friend, even before you had sex, then it might be time to end your current relationship and see how things go with your friend.
That said, if you have only developed feelings after you have had sex, then it could just be the rush of excitement felt from taking that step further with him. You need to decide which it is- a novelty or an indication to make a go of things with him.
Either way, you should really be honest with your man. How would you feel if he had slept with someone behind your back? The likelihood is if you tell him he will end things. If you decide to keep it a secret then it may well come out anyway.
Many relationships begin from being friends and it’s just a risk you have to take if you see potential in it. You could lose both of them or you could build upon an existing friendship and let it blossom into a romance, but you need to figure out how strong your feelings are for one another to chance your situation as it currently stands.
Good luck,
Lucy x
tagged in Friends Friendship boyfriend yin and yang agony aunt
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