Lucy asks :
Hi Lucy,
I've been with my boyfriend on and off for the past year, lots has gone on in that time, we've both slept with other people and the trust between us has slowly gotten worse because of this. For the past 4 months we became as close as ever and talked about being with each other for the rest of our lives. He then announced he was going abroad for 3 months, he's admitted to getting with 2 people while he's been away but wants to carry on with me when he gets back. He's my first true love but I don't know whether to end things now, or try again when he comes back? Has too much damage been done? Am I being a mug?
Our Reply
Hi Lucy,
It is one thing to give your relationship another try after one infidelity but given that you have both been unfaithful and he has slept with another two women since then, it might suggest that he won’t be able to remain monogamous in the future.
If you can maintain an open relationship then this could be for you but if you want him to remain faithful then chances are you might get hurt again.
If you make a move now then you can be on the road to recovery when he comes back rather than waiting until he returns to begin this process. If you wait then you might be left wondering where you stand and be disappointed when you find out.
It sounds like the initial infidelity might have brought you closer together for a little while, but it seems that it hasn’t lasted. It is one thing to promise a future together but you both need to show it with your actions and right now he is not supporting his words with his indiscretions.
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