Hi Kate,

Love is about saying it but also showing it too. There are times in relationships where we take the other person for granted and forget to show them love momentarily when we are upset for instance but this should not be all the time. If he treats you badly for the most part of your relationship then this can’t be good from your side of things.

‘Irritating’ and ‘fake’ are some very bold observations about someone’s personality, so it is no surprise that you see him differently now. I am not agreeing with his view of you- but the likelihood is that you have a well-established personality and it’s difficult to change something about yourself if you have always acted in a certain way. Have you asked him why he thinks this? Has he given you examples?  If you don't agree with him then maybe talk to him about it and perhaps defend yourself where you think he might be wrong.

You have mentioned leaving him so it seems that it has already crossed your mind. Sometimes you have to be a little bit selfish and think of your own happiness before someone else’s. If he is not treating you well and picking out things he doesn't like about you rather than what he does then this is very destructive for your relationship.

Could his mood swings be attributed to something deeper? That might explain his attitude towards you. But ultimately, love is about constructive criticism not blatant accusation and name calling.