ruby asks :
My partner insists on us having a completely exclusive relationship. I don;t mean just sexually. In this aspect I agree with him totally. he believes we should be enough for each other. I like to socialize with other couples, have dinner parties, meet friends for drinks. Nothing outrageous. A few drinks, chat. That's it. He thinks that our relationship should be enough and I shouldn't need/want to do this. I am beginning to resent this control strongly.
Yin replies
As long as you are not cheating on him then seeing your friends and having time without him is a healthy thing. The strongest couples are those who are able to spend time together and apart. Splitting off for a few hours means that you can bring new conversation to the mix, otherwise you will find that the interaction between you both will become stagnant and predictable.
If you like to socialise, that is part of who you are and your makeup, which means if you take that away you will also be giving part of yourself away too. A relationship is often never enough on its own, because it’s the relationships with others that contribute to your happiness within your romantic relationship.
Yang replies
Try talking to him and tell him that without your friends this impacts on your happiness. It sounds like he may have some trust issues which could be why he is frightened if you go out with other people. Reassure him that you trust him and that he should give you the same respect. If he doesn’t accept that you have other aspects of your life then you will resent him even more and possibly affect the relationship in the long term.
tagged in Friends Partner Couples Relationship yin and yang agony aunt
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