Sana asks :
Hi Lucy.
I’m 28 years old and in love someone very much but he has married another girl and he still wants to be in contact with me..I can’t live without him but can’t bear his being married to another girl. Every time his marriage haunts me. I get tensed, when he don’t contact with me. What I can do to have him back. Please help me. Thanks
Our Reply
Hi Sana, thanks for getting in touch.
Is this a one sided love? Do you know if he loves you back? If he is happily married then its down to you to move on- if feelings are not reciprocated then there is no point in pursuing this.
He may want to be in touch with you but not in that way- he might just want to be friends. I would suggest trying to get past from this. It will hurt every time you see them together; however being in touch is a constant reminder that he is with someone else and when he doesn’t contact you you are left wondering why.
Why not leave it to him to initiate the next move, but carry on with your life so it doesn’t dictate your happiness. You may think right now that living without him is impossible but once you break away a little from him and the situation you might gain some perspective.
Do you really want to be the person responsible for breaking up a marriage that could be fine? If you try to drive a wedge between him and his wife it could end up being much worse- she might forbid you to see him for example.
Try and focus on your new life where he doesn’t affect your mood and look for someone who will keep in constant contact with you.
Good luck,
Lucy x
tagged in Love married yin and yang agony aunt
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