Here, she recounts her adventure and explains why solo travel is empowering, fulfilling, and worth embracing.
Arctic Image courtesy Hakan Durgut Pixabay
For Christmas 2024, I decided to do things a little differently. I travelled solo to Tromsø in Norway to experience Christmas in the Arctic. Since hitting 40, I’ve become obsessed with wilderness holidays and connecting with nature. I’ve had my eye on Norway, and the northern lights in particular, for quite some time.
I’ve always been a person who has basked in being single. Never complained, never moped around wishing I was in a relationship. I’ve always seen being single as an opportunity—to get to know myself better, focus on my career without any distractions, and restore myself. I don’t let my age or relationship status define my capabilities. If I want to do something, I go and do it; I don’t wait around for things to happen. I love the freedom of travelling solo and the fact that I am more likely to meet people when I’m on my own.
As a woman who has survived domestic violence, travelling solo doesn’t scare me (in fact, very little does since surviving such an experience). I’ve always been quite bold. I like to challenge myself in order to grow. Obviously, travelling solo means having your wits about you and if something doesn’t feel right then listen to your inner voice. When it comes to travelling in my 40s, solitude, nature, and peace are high up on my list.
THE FACTS
According to the Association of British Travel Agents, the number of solo trips has increased from 6% in 2011 to 16% in 2023 (The Guardian). We are seeing a growing trend in the number of people choosing to travel on their own with the biggest increase being amongst 35–44 year olds.
As Dr Joe Dispenza, author, researcher, lecturer, and corporate consultant states:
“Being alone allows us to break free from social dependency patterns. The majority of people live in a constant state of social referencing, always comparing and seeking social validation. But women who live alone develop something remarkable: an internal reference point that’s completely independent of external validation. Your brain actually changes its reward patterns. Instead of getting dopamine hits from social approval, you start generating those feel-good chemicals through self-reservation and independent achievement. And the less you need other people’s energy, the more they are drawn to yours.”
I heard recently that married men live longer than single men. However, the same is not true for married women. Single ladies are more likely to live longer than married ladies. I’m not knocking marriage or relationships—I think it’s great to be in love and commit to someone.
But at this point in my life, what works for me right now is being single. So the fact that I may live longer as a single lady rather than being married is all the assurance I need! Society will try and tell you differently: that there is shame and stigma against women who dare to go against the grain, and who are happily single and childfree. I am here to challenge that and show that there are so many positives to not only living on your own but also travelling on your own.
THE BENEFITS OF TRAVELLING SOLO
- Builds Confidence
Travelling solo helped me to build my confidence and trust in myself. With no one but myself to rely on when making decisions and navigating my way through unfamiliar territory, I developed a strong sense of self and an ‘If I can survive in this country on my own, I can survive anything’ kind of attitude. I returned to the UK ready to tackle life’s challenges head on. All the things that I had been worrying about in London suddenly seemed quite mundane as I returned with a fresh perspective having just survived in the most hostile conditions out in the Arctic.
2. A Chance to Bask in Solitude and Reconnect With Ourselves
During my snowshoe trip out in the mountains, one of the tour guides explained that the indigenous Sami culture regularly go out into the wilderness to spend time on their own and be at one with nature. There is something wonderfully healing and restorative about that. To allow ourselves time to sit on our own without any outside noise or influences certainly is of huge appeal for me and many others choosing to travel solo.
I’ve never been a huge fan of being in big groups. I’ve always found it a little overwhelming, losing my sense of self when amongst large groups for prolonged periods of time. Perhaps more so in my 20s when I was an avid people pleaser who just went along with what everyone else wanted to do rather than speak up for myself. The years of hard partying and desire to be at every glamorous event possible are long behind me. Don’t get me wrong, they were fun times and memoires to last a lifetime. And I still enjoy the odd night out.
But my life has new meaning and new purpose now. I don’t get FOMO (fear of missing out). I know how good I’ve got it living in a peaceful household and finding my purpose in writing and helping others. I’m now a confident woman who knows what she wants and what makes her happy. And at this moment, at this point in my life, it is solitude. Solitude to me represents peace.
I’ve never seen being alone as being lonely. The loneliest I’ve ever felt was when I was married. I’ve always seen being on my own as an opportunity to reconnect with myself, restore myself, and create distance from the noise of everyday life. It’s a great way to gain clarity. I always return to London with a completely different mindset having just invested time in myself.
3. More Likely to Meet People
I often find that when I am travelling solo, I am much more likely to be sociable and meet people from different walks of life whereas if I’m travelling with a partner or with a group, the chances of meeting new people are much slimmer. When I was snowshoeing up a mountain on the brink of a storm in Norway, I met a lovely lady from New York. We sat next to each other on the bus journey back to our accommodation and had such an interesting conversation about life, relationships, and love. That conversation never would have happened had I been travelling with others. We have since connected on social media.
I also met two lovely ladies from Bahrain during my dog-sledding trip on Christmas Day. As we ventured into the warmth of the dining room, being served vegetable soup and homemade bread, they asked if they could sit with me. We did not stop chatting away and it was interesting to hear what life was like in Bahrain. I was enticed by the promise of luxurious spa treatments, a common ground between us. One of the ladies was intrigued about my experience as a solo traveller. I assured her to just go for it! We also connected on social media.
Stepping out of your comfort zone is a big part of travelling solo. It encourages us to open up, seize the moment, and meet lots of interesting people whom we wouldn’t normally speak to if travelling in the bubble of a group. The conversations I had and the people that I met will remain with me for some time.
4. Skills to Last a Lifetime
Problem solving and decision-making skills are strengthened when travelling solo. On the way back to my accommodation after the dog-sledding trip, the bus driver refused to take me back to my accommodation (which was just out of town), claiming he was running behind schedule and could only take me some of the way and that I’d have to walk the rest (on my own, in the dark, on extremely slipper surfaces after substantial rainfall). Just as he was driving me out of Tromsø, I saw a taxi rank, acted on impulse, told the bus driver to stop and jumped out and into a cab. When I returned to Tromsø Lodge and Camping, the ladies at the reception assured me that this was not normal practise and the agreement that they have with the tour companies is to bring all guests back after the excursions.
But even in such a situation, I listened to my instinct and acted upon it. I faced an issue and quickly resolved it (problem solving + decision making = skills enhanced). If I can do that out in the Arctic then I certainly do that back in London.
5. Freedom
When it comes to solo travel, there is so much freedom in choosing to do what you want, when you want. For me, it felt like I was able to spread my wings wide open and give myself space to breathe.
ONLY THE BEGINNING
So, if you are someone who has been considering travelling on your own, just go for it! You will return a wiser version of yourself with an additional layer of resilience that you never knew you had. Obviously create some awareness and always listen to your gut if something doesn’t feel right. In Norway, there are lots of group excursions so you have plenty of opportunity to be amongst others and meet people if you want to.
I don’t think travelling solo is any more dangerous than travelling within a group. It’s all down to awareness and perspective. I cringe at how vulnerable I use to make myself when partying recklessly on group holidays. That, to me, seems like a far more dangerous situation than travelling solo. At least now I have the clarity of mind to make educated decisions.
So, who knows, perhaps my recent trip to Norway is the first of many adventures out in the Arctic. Perhaps I will now be adding ‘Elizabeth G: Adventurer’ to my bio. One thing is for sure: venturing out into the unknown and testing your limits is well worth the experience!
Elizabeth G. is a British author and podcaster who campaigns for, and is a vocal advocate of, equality for sex workers. She is currently trying to expand the scope of The Equality Act 2010 to include the sex industry in order to protect those working within it from discrimination. Her candid memoir, ‘Unashamed: Why Do People Pay for Sex?’ is out now.
Tagged in Travel Health Wellbeing