Chantelle and Alex have finally named their daughter, five weeks after her birth. It took them over a month to come up with Dolly – an adorable name for a cute baby, toddler or child, but when she grows up will she thank her parents for it?
Sex on Female First
Do names make us think twice about someone? Or is that just me?
Years ago, I dated a man called Troy. He was incredibly handsome, intelligent and fun to be with but every time I mentioned him to my friends or family I got a fit of the giggles. All I could see in my head was the puppet on strings in the 60's show Stingray, swimming with Marina, one of my favourite TV programmes when I was young.
I have actually turned down a date with an Arthur because I had a mental picture of him being a little white haired man, even though he was only 39. I hated going out with Jeremy and Geoffrey because I was convinced they were both gay – which I can hastily confirm, they weren't. I struggle to date anyone with an 'ie' or 'y' on the end of their name because it feels like I'm dating a schoolboy. Jamie, Bobby, Mikey and Benny all did that to me but when I was introduced to a Benji all I could see was the cute, scruffy, performing dog I used to watch on TV. It would have been like dating a puppy!
The dilemma I'm currently having is - should I date a man with a woman's name? I've had the offer before and I'm yet again trying to decide if a name really matters. Thankfully I'm not one for shouting out a man's name during the throes of passion, which is a good thing because I could never have seen myself shouting Troy, Benji or Geoffrey at any point. I even struggled to call their name in a pub or in a shop. If I was a name caller I would be feeling a little odd calling a woman's name in bed, especially when I'm most definitely straight. But it's bizarre how a name can have an influence on your potential feelings and this is why if I ever had kids (doubtful) I would ponder their names for the full nine months.
The latest man I am looking to meet is called Lesley/Leslie - damn it, I don't even know how to spell it. He refers to himself as Les, but even then I want to finish it with 'bian' !! So Lesley/Leslie is my current dilemma. In the past I have dated a Sandy - and you know that makes you think of Olivia Newton-John in Grease. Then there was a Lucy - and yes I know that sounds ridiculous, but it was short for Lucian. There was also a Kelly, and I'm still convinced he wasn't quite sure where he lay in the gender divide.
So the problem I now have is should I ignore a name and see the person, and can I ever ignore the psychological block I have with some names. I have always been a fan of my men being real men. I like them butch and strong and oozing testosterone, and having a girls name just kills it for me. It's similar to having a very effeminate voice, having a very slight build or a certain 'wiggle' or 'quality', it just doesn't do it for me. But when they start wanting to wear my underwear that's when I truly question their motives for dating me.
I know we all have our preferences and I suppose mine is a 'manly' man, but should a name stop me meeting anyone? After all, one of the biggest, butchest men who ever was - Big Daddy - the wrestler from the seventies, was christened Shirley!
Has a name, voice or walk ever stopped you from dating or even meeting someone? And for any male readers, would you be comfortable dating a woman with a blokes name, like Stevie, Jamie, Alex or Bob?
Karen uses leading married persons dating website, IllicitEncounters.com
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