Rachel MacLynn – relationship and dating expert discusses fear of rejection

14 March 2016

Have you ever found yourself in the sea in the summer momentarily alone and bobbing with your face at water level, when suddenly the JAWS theme pops into your head? Your heart constricts with fear and you start to swim frantically and irrationally the three feet and three arm strokes to the shallows.

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Jiminy Cricket may always be on your shoulder to be your conscious guide, but is Roger Rejection sitting heavily on the other shoulder so that the moment you are faced with potential romance the Jaws music starts playing and you flee the scene.

Let's face it we've all been rejected by someone at some point in our lives but the question is; will we let it grip us with fear forever preventing true happiness from getting in? We've shown up to no end of dates and even managed to get rather optimistically into a relationship or even a marriage, when bam! The Jaws of rejection slam shut and leave our confidence in tatters only to be replayed over and over in our mind anytime love and romance swims near.

Flick rejection off that shoulder and make room for encouragement. Be your own cheer leader and dole out a loving reminder that you are truly sensational and those rejecters have only moved on to make someone else's life miserable. The loss is theirs not yours! It's important to understand that rejection is a risk you take in getting anywhere in life. If you don't try you won't succeed.

Don't sabotage the chance at happiness by closing down a compliment or a kind gesture. If we run away from what we decide from own experience will likely be rejection, then the potential of a yes will elude us altogether. No, everyone is not the same as the people who hurt you with their rejections, so you have to be fair and give someone else a chance to love you. You must remind yourself that you deserve the right to be happy and in love.

Meryl Streep was told she was too ugly for the film King Kong but didn't allow that to derail her dream to be an actress. "It forced me to pull myself up by the boot straps and believe in myself". 19 Academy Award nominations and three wins later she has proved she was the better person. Remember you're beautiful and someone out there will treasure you more than any award and banishing rejection from your mind at the same time.